A Love Letter 

By Olivia Kan-Sperling

Hanni wears Gucci

GUCCI knitwear cardigan, shorts and leather boots.

Using this voice, let me tell you some basic facts about NewJeans. This article is accompanied by photographs. In the photos, you see five girls. They are members of the incredibly internationally successful K-pop girl group NewJeans and probably, they are a lot younger than you. Their names are Hanni, Haerin, Minji, Hyein, and Danielle. NewJeans debuted in summer of 2022 with a series of singles that instantly topped global charts. In the group photo, Hanni is the one with the light blue sweater. Haerin is right above her. Hyein is at the very top. Neither of Minji’s hands can be seen in the photo. And Danielle has the deconstructed argyle blouse. Hanni’s favorite colors are gray and mint, she likes eating pizza and taking pictures of clouds (whether they’re strange, pretty, or cute), and one thing she hates is apples that aren’t crunchy. Apparently, her male English name is Harry. I’m not sure exactly what that means — this is just some of the information on K-pop fan website kprofiles.com, as compiled by user binanacake. You might wonder how binanacake knows all this, and so do I. But rest assured, K-pop fans are some of the most obsessive researchers, documenters, and posters in the world, so these facts are likely trustworthy. Haerin’s special charm is her eyes and she values color in any object. If she could say only one word for the rest of her life, it would be a word blending yes and no. Minji prefers crispy cookies to sticky cookies, robots to dinosaurs, sugar to salt, and feels best when she is being complimented for being smart. Hyein’s nickname is “faucet” because she cries a lot. She is #Maximalist and #FullofCuriosity. If she could say one word for the rest of her life, it would be “I love you.” Danielle smiles a lot. If she wasn’t an idol (in Korean, 아이돌, aidol, a K-pop star), she might be a veterinarian, and though her favorite color is baby blue, really, she likes all colors. If she could only use one word forever, Danielle would pick ‘uh’ — because it could be used even in unpleasant situations. Like Hanni, she hates apples that aren’t crunchy. Her biggest fear is being alone in this world.

  

Haerin wears Dior

DIOR turtleneck sweater, “Miss Dior” print peacoat; DIOR Addict lip glow in #001 pink and rouge blush color & glow in #475 Diorette.

Although Hanni, Haerin, Hyein, Minji, and Danielle have different favorite foods, and (usually) different hairstyles, and are ambassadors for different global luxury fashion brands — in other words, they are each unique — their most special quality is their unity. NewJeans are perfect synchronicity. Think of them as differently-colored petals on one Takashi Murakami flower. I didn’t come up with that image; it’s their most recent double single album cover (Supernatural, 2024). NewJeans is a closed set of perfectly distinct, symmetrically individualized components, and that is their appeal. Their lovely complementarity and multi-colored coherence is pleasing because it assures us that good things are possible.

“If you have never listened to NewJeans, you should now.”   

Danielle wears Celine 

If you have never listened to NewJeans, you should do that now. But maybe you don’t have any devices. Maybe you are on an airplane, or maybe your AirPods died. Maybe you just like reading. If you find yourself in any of these situations, don’t worry. This article will use words, in an imaginative, magical realist style, to create a narrative analog to the sonic and visual landscape of their work. By the time you’ve finished, you will be in the perfect mood for NewJeans. Please pay special attention to the adjectives. Okay? Okay.

  

NewJeans wears Kiko Kostandinov

 

You’ve just woken up to a Perfect Day. The sun is shining. But you didn’t oversleep! You’re an early riser. Your laundry is clean and colorful. You feel like dancing. You dip a crispy cookie (your favorite kind) into your freshly-made coffee. You slice an apple into five perfect pieces, and it is super crunchy. (NewJeans lyrics frequently use food and flavor as metaphors.) A thought bubble appears over your head. You are smiling. Why? Because you just realized — every day is a gift!!! This is important, so please remember it. It is what I believe, and it is why I love NewJeans. When you listen to NewJeans, it will feel like opening a present. It will feel like this the first time and the fiftieth time opening a present. If NewJeans were a gif, they would be a flower blooming; if NewJeans were a sound effect, they would be the fizz of a freshly popped can of Coca-Cola; if NewJeans were a piece of clothing, they would be a new pair of jeans; if NewJeans were the best possible thing you could imagine in your Perfect Day, they would be your crush texting you out of the blue. (These are all motifs drawn from their oeuvre, as you will, I hope, soon discover.)

Minji wears Chanel

CHANEL iridescent tweed coat, coated denim jeans, shearling boots and metal & strass necklace; stylist’s own tank top.

The next thing that happens, since this is a Perfect Day, is exactly what I said it would. You glance down at your phone, gleaming darkly on your pillow. Ugh… Underneath your peace and tranquility, there is a hint of baby-blue sadness. If NewJeans were only about happiness, they would be boring, and this would be a boring story.

Hyein wears Louis Vuitton

LOUIS VUITTON peplum jacket and turtleneck.

Actually, listening to NewJeans also evokes the bittersweet melancholy of passing youth and, frequently, young love. So your phone is there, and it is black, blank, empty, silent. You sigh. You turn to your desk, where — just like in the music video for “Zero” — a set of colored pencils and a cute notebook lay open before you. You look at the postcards pinned to your pink bulletin board. You begin doodling hearts, flying birds, stars, and bunnies... When suddenly, from behind you… your phone makes a popping, pinging, bursting sound. Rushing over, you see a new notification... It’s a message from your crush!!! But... hm... what does it mean? It seems to be written in Korean, and you don’t speak Korean! Oh no. Why is your crush texting you in Korean? It’s exciting to learn that they are fluent in another language, but it’s also confusing. The best NewJeans videos have an air of mystery, conspiracy, and even darkness. There are many fan theories dedicated to decoding their lush, symbolically suggestive narratives, which feature mental institutions, Lynchian red door-portals, and characters that seem to float somewhere between the realities of pop song and real life, live action and animation, this world and the next. 

 

“If NewJeans were only about happiness, they would be boring, and this would be a boring story.” 

 

Anyway, you have no idea how to respond. You could say, “Don’t want no riddle / 말해줘 say it back, oh, say it ditto,” or you could say “Hi, it’s me again, I’m back (hey) / Let’s talk ASAP” or “Cause I know what you like boy (ah-ah) / You’re my chemical hype boy (ah-ah).” You feel like saying “...uh?”, or a word blending yes and no. Really, of course, you want to say “I love you.” (In the video for “Right Now,” Hanni, Haerin, Hyein, Danielle, and Minji attempt to solve a similar problem, offering different interpretations of an enigmatic emoji — the aforementioned Murakami flower — one member has received in response to her text.) You throw your phone melodramatically onto your bed, and sink your head into your hands. Gradually, you perceive a soft, sweet wind, gently tickling the back of your neck. You smell green apples, cotton candy, and fresh-cut grass. When you look up, there are five life-size girls hovering over your bed. They sit in a neat row. Their legs are crossed, all the same way. They shimmer slightly in the iridescent rays of light shining through your window, which suddenly seems to be coming from somewhere much stranger than the sun... They are wearing gray schoolgirl uniforms. They don’t cast a shadow. They hold a finger to their lips, in perfect unison. They giggle. They grab your phone from where it lies on the pillow. They rise together in one smooth motion. They swirl slowly — then fly out the window! “Hey!” you gasp. “My phone!” Before you know it, you’ve run out your front door, just in time to see the five ghostly girls skipping through the air, way down the road. Thankfully, just at that moment, a bus pulls up to the curb. It’s headed in that direction! You spring on, breathless. You can see the girls rounding the bend up ahead, their black hair swishing gracefully as they go...